I grew up in Italy with two foreign parents, torn between three cultures. I was proud of it, although sometimes it meant that I had to choose between different positions. And I was often “the only one that…”; the only one who was not baptised, the only one with a foreign last name,…
As an adult, I complicated the matter even further, moving to a fourth country and adding a fifth culture by marrying someone not from one of those four countries. I don’t experience cultural shocks every day, but I realised that the war in Ukraine is putting me in front of a dilemma again. I am not talking about Russia vs Ukraine, I am rather talking about Western propaganda vs “the others'” position (allow me to oversimplify for the sake of explaining myself). I don’t like so much when non-Western complain about how colonialism created the current mess in Afghanistan, or when I hear that the US are evil because they destroy countries for their own interest, and not because I think this is not true, just because it presents a black & white vision of things, it oversimplifies complicated external policies and international relations (like I am doing here, I know).
I do realise that we cannot empathise with everybody and every fxxxed up situation around us, and in the end, I also pick sides. Empathy is a feeling, and as such, it’s not rational. The western person supporting Ukrainians is driven by emotions as much as the non-western person criticizing the political decision of fast-tracking Ukraine’s access to the EU.
Having said so, already in 2001 I was saddened but how much more importance and media space was given to the Twin Towers’ victims compared to the kids dying in Afghanistan or in Iraq, as in 2022 I am angered by the fact that Ukrainian refugees are welcome to enter and stay in Europe whereas Rwandans are sent back from the UK. It’s the “it could have been us” feeling that I don’t get, because I feel close to both sides, or maybe to none of them, if of sides we can talk.
I feel every newsletter from a European or American media outlet at the moment start with the war in Ukraine, and every time I snort, because I would like to read about other international news, instead of knowing every detail of what’s happening in Ukraine I would like to know a bit more of what is happening in Burkina Faso, Myanmar, Ethiopia, Yemen – just to name a few. Then I read or hear people saying that it’s because Ukrainians are white, are more similar to us, which I don’t believe, at least if I speak from the point of view of an Italian, I believe an Italian feels closer to a Palestinian or a Syrian than an Ukrainian or Russian, culturally speaking. I have to admit that fear plays a big role in the impact this war has on people, be it the fear of a nuclear war or of a spillover into Europe. Then again, I think of the impact western countries’ actions have on “the other countries” – such as soaring food prices in Egypt or Morocco, and about how careless we are about it because our interests come first.
Recently I went to listen to Fatou Diome, a French-Senegalese inspiring writer, and someone from the public asked her if this double standard of how refugees from Congo and from Ukraine are treated differently angered her. She answered that we shouldn’t choose resentment, but rather see it as a positive example, in the sense that we should wish that the current crisis will make Europeans more empathetic towards people suffering, whrerevere they are from. I appreciated her comment, and felt little because I had chosen resentment. Let’s hope that she is right and that welcoming Ukrainian refugees will help Europe and Europeans understand that opening our borders is not going to disrupt our society, our job market and our security.
Blabbering of a millennial 