About change (again)

I was thinking about change again. This time about personal change. #noteasy. There are things that I know I have to improve and I know how to improve them – in theory – and still nothing. For instance, I should speak louder and slower. Do I do it? No. Do I know why I should do it? Yes. Do I know why I do it? Yes. The reason I speak slow and fast is because I am shy and feel people don’t want to listen to me, so I try to 1. Not attract attention 2. Finish faster so people can concentrate on other people I think they prefer to listen to. Do I accomplish something doing like this? No I actually make it worse, because often people don’t hear me, which reinforces the feeling of not wanting to be heard, and people don’t understand because I speak too fast. Voilà. #greatsuccess